Beer Review: Light Beer + Exercise = Still Fat
I’m getting fat. That’s a factual statement… not a hyper-sensitive, metro-sexual complaint. If I didn’t spend half my life in gyms and weight rooms, this probably wouldn’t bother me so much. But, alas, it does. Recently, with Spring here and vacation plans looming, I’ve attempted to make the move to light beer in an attempt to prepare myself for a bathing suit… here’s what I’ve found:
- Light beer blows…
- I’m not really losing any weight… and…
- It’s not worth sacrificing flavor and my dignity for a few calories.
All that said… I put together my *list* of light beers. As you’ll see… I fell off the wagon pretty quickly and more or less broke the calorie rules with all of these.
Yuengling Light: not bad. Tasted like Yuengling’s wussy little brother. You know the little brother I’m talking about. The guy that kind of looks like his older brother… only he’s less attractive and really needs to hit the gym a couple times a week so he can put on a few pounds. In the end though, he never gets laid… and the girls he dates tend to always be a little on the “robust” side.
Amstel Light: I do like Amstel quite a bit. I always felt that their tag line “the beer drinker’s light beer” was dead on. I find myself drinking it when other people are downing glasses of wine among the socially elite at business events.
Stella Artois: Okay… so it’s not *technically* a light beer. But it’s 135 calories and in my book… if it’s a gold hue, and I can see through it, it’s a light beer. Bottom line, I love Stella. Much like Amstel Light, I usually pair it with people in black cocktail attire.
Kenzinger: Definitely NOT a light beer… it’s technically a lager. But again, it sports a golden hue and a translucent quality. Not that it matters really… b/c this guy is not a fan. I have been told by several friends that the ‘Zinger is their go-to… they must be hard of taste or something… b/c no thank you!
So bottom line… like I said… I’m off the wagon. Back to hearty Pilsners and hoppy spring lagers.
